Picture AND Video Fail

Rarely does an advert get it totally wrong in both selling mediums, but here we have a prime exhibit. The ad is for a young stallion named Smirnoff Ice- an alcopop for those not familiar with it- and at first glance it appears that the seller has over indulged in said beverage.

Yes the advert does look like a jigsaw, and yes, that's right, none of the shots shows the pony in full! In fact here's a close up of the 'best' one:

But it's ok, because there's a video- in fact there are three! So we can just check those out. 

Oh well, maybe the others are better:

Oh dear. Nope, all about 10 seconds of a majorly geed up pony sort of trotting towards people who don't seem to be able to keep the camera straight!

I sincerely hope that these are just make do efforts and they are going to try again as I am not sure what you can tell from this... he might have a nice flashy trot, but whether it would be as flashy if he wasn't practically trying to tank off with his rider I can't say! 

Time to have another go I suggest, maybe filming from further away? Be nice to see the whole horse clearly.

Wow, so that's not Irresponsible...

Why would a legitimate horse rescue organisation post ads like this (Link, Link)?! These two are from Equine Now and are posted, as you can see, by a group called Second Wind Rescue.

Yes folks that is not one but two adverts offering a BREEDING STALLION FOR SALE.
No mistakes- that is the title of the ad and comes up under a 'breeding stock' search.

Here's the problem-
-Neither horse is in good health (melanoma/looks like hell and doesn't seem to have great legs- see below!!)
-Both are older animals- so chances of landing on their feet permanently if just sold off and not kept under some form of guardianship are slim
-Both are priced to appeal to the idiot backyard breeder (Hey Wilma- hitch up the trailer! Got me a stallion for the old mare out back, registered and everything! *head-desk*).

Most importantly-
IF YOU ARE A GOOD RESCUE WHY WOULD YOU EVER EVER CONSIDER THESE ANIMALS SUCH FANTASTIC BREEDING STOCK THAT THEY ARE SUITABLE TO BE SENT OUT INTO THE WIDE WORLD WITH BALLS ATTACHED TO CREATE MORE OF THEIR KIND!!!

Jeez they are just not that special, poor guys. At a time when people are trying to sell horse for peanuts/dumping them on roads and out in the country/abandoning them at boarding stables and livery yards/shooting them rather than have to find the money to feed them no one should be more aware of the problem than the rescues trying to tackle the mess.

I seriously question the ethics of this organisation. SERIOUSLY. Poor horses!

Butt, Butt, Butt...

This is bemusing. I gather that for Quarter Horses a big rear end is a desirable feature. But to the extent that you don't get to see any other bits of the horse?

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Exhibit C:

Exhibit D:

Maybe it's just me, but if you can only get one shot in of the horse you're selling, wouldn't you want to show more of it on a better angle? I mean, to my mind you don't JUST buy a horse off the backside of it, cos if you spend that much time looking at your horse's rear end you're doing SOMETHING wrong! As the old saying has it, that's the end that KICKS!

USA/Quarter horse peeps, please feel free to enlighten me?!

Advert of the Day

Deep breath....









annnnnd GO!



I have a black and white mustang named bandit I'm selling him because I don't have time to ride him or spend with him n it's not fair to the Little guy he's grate horse I had him since he was 8 n he was not broke n he is 12 now I broke him but haven't done to much with him he I have put him on cows and he loves them with some training he could be a really nice cutting horse he learns quit n picks up on hat u r doing he's small but real stocky he is very forward will do anything u ask of him jump run go around a barrel though bushes corn fields he love to swim unsay let's swim give his head he he will run n just about jump in the creek to the deepest spot lol he dose get nerves around people he dose not know but when he gets to know you and trust you he will have a strong bond with you for the longest time my ferrie couldn't touch him unless I was there n now he's good with him I had a girl lease him until she went back to school and just loved him you can ride him a hack a more a bit or haulter he won't eat grass when u r on his back or holding him on a lead unless he knows you say it's ok stands to mont picks up all 4 feet to pick good on cross ties loads very well he just needs some basic work but u can trial ride him alone or with other horses will not kick or bite at a horse or person if u would like to come see bandit my name is Lauren just call or text 267 753 5079 or email

Yep, we have apparently never heard of a full stop!

Who wouldn't want a horse like this he's 'grate', learns 'quit' and stands still to 'mont'. Presumably she has someone to trim and do her horse's feet (a FARRIER) and not a large boat that likes to rub alongside horses (Ferry/Ferrie?!!). 

BTW he looks brown and white to me- anyone else?!

Still a cute little fella who would be a good friend for a kid somewhere- visit the link here if you're interested. 

The breathless wording and fact that the horse is on a funny angle in the  photo just makes it feel like the seller rushed this ad BIG TIME. 

I don't think horse selling ads really need the grammar police coming down on them hard all the time, but your ad should at least be readable enough to make sense!! People are busy and trying to decipher vague or confusing words and sentences is hard work when you've got several ads at once to work through- unless your horse is something extraordinary a lot of them might give up! 

 If you're not sure and are even half aware that the written word isn't your strongest medium, why wouldn't you get someone to read it over for you before you post it- even spell check can get you halfway there!

Thanks Craigslist Philadelphia for this one! 

Craigslist Goes Ga Ga

Ah Craigslist. There can't be many people who don't know about it, maybe the odd UK resident. Just to fill you all in, Craigslist is a free listing site for people selling/offering pretty much everything (literally- we're talking adult services to fruit, or in some instances, the two combined!).

Horse selling on Craigslist is pretty common and reaches various standards, from the expert, to the clueless, and finally the demented. And today we present what is quite possibly the criminally insane. People, if you know this man, please keep him away from animals and children.

Thanks to Snarky Rider for this bizarre item!

AD CONTENT:

Hello, this is my lovely horse legacy. He has been in my family for 5 years. He truly is a wonderful creature. At night, his mane glows like the brightest of juptiers moons. It is what we in the horse world call "magical". I give him daily protein shakes to make sure he countinues to grow big and strong. I don't know when he'll stop growing, he'll probably countinue to until his time comes. Please be prepared to accommodate a horse the size of a small tank if you plan on keeping him for more then a month. I feed him a strict diet of cucumbers and horseradish. Some people say that it's sick to feed a horse horseradish, but sense horse radish doesn't actually have horse in it, I'm sure it's ok.

800 OBO if you have any albino chickens we may be able to negotiate. Or 800 dollars worth of Fred Meyers gift cards so I can countinue to buy horseradish for my other horse.

Call 1-(307) 340-1521 to contact me. My name is Austin Boone. In order to ensure your not spam, please say "you have a magnificent stead on your hands I'd like to obtain. I'm pretty sure no telephone operator from overseas can say that correctly.

By no means do I think this is serious (college kid prank perhaps), but sadly I would still BET that someone out there does ring and try to acquire this non existent horse!

What's most terrifying here though is that the photo is not dissimilar to actual sales ad I have seen over the years!

It's a What Now?

Some more light relief for today, courtesy of an excellent site I found, now listed in my faves, called Horse Trader Tricks. Their 'for fun' page is just one of many excellent items they have to offer, I heartily recommend a visit!

I am a little surprised that 'Fellabella' doesn't make an appearance in this list, but please enjoy:

Creative Breed & Color Spellings

APPALOSO /Quarter pregant - $500-I have a four year old appaloso quarter for sale she is pregant she is not broke to ride .I have saddle her up and i have sit on her. She was bred with a liver and white paint .

APOOLOSSA - $8500

LEOPARD SPOTTED APPOOSA HORSE 5YRS. TRICK HORSE ANY ONE CAN RIDE

blue rhone apalusa - $600

chetlyn pony - $250 young chetklyn pony, kid friendly


12 yr old Carmello Reg. Fox Trotter - $1000-This guy is a 12 yr old. He stands 15.1 hands tall. He is a registered Missouri Fox Trotter, carmello in color and built like a quarter horse.

Horse for Sale-He is 14.2 hands a good trail horse. He is a carmelloh. very good additude. Sweet and loving. age 6 years old.

AQHA quarter horse beautiful!! CRAMELLO!

Kid broke, gentle gelding - $700
15 hand, creamellow Quarter Horse gelding. Very gentle. Great on the trails and in the round pen. Very nice slow, easy canter. No vices/bad habits. He rides on a loose rein with a natural low head set. Eight years old. Current coggins and worming. Please call for an appointment to ride this gentle gelding. Thanks.

Blue Rome horse - $275-i have a 10 year old blue Rome horse that is green broke..you can saddle her up and everything and ride her but she doesn't know a lot of stuff but she know some...she is a pretty horse but her lip hangs down because she got it caught on a barb wire fence...if any questions or pictures please txt dont call..

Choclate palamino - $1800-very gental gelding, no bad habits, anybody can ride, very muscular and very beautiful, has a flaken maine and tail and is choclate colored

For Sale- 6 year old leopard print mare broke,sweet,very pretty,1000.00 or 1200.00 with tack,call or text,can send photo

Thero-bread chestnut horse - $100-im getting rid of her because we simply cannot afford her, shes got brand new front shoes on her, theres nothing wrong with her if u have any questions contact me.

8 year old reg sorrow mare - $800

Young 2 year old Chest Nut - $350-I'm selling a 2 year old chest nut gelding that I have started and is green broke. He stands at 13.5. Get along with the other horses great. He will make great 4-H horse for a child. $350 obo


5year old Geurla Gelding - $650

Thourebreed mare - $400

11 yo Medicine Hat Paint - $300- I am an 11 year old Tabiano-Overian Paint gelding. I have a medicine hat, bald face and blue eys. I am VERY green and need a lot of work. I stand well for the ferrier. I am skidish.

Horses for Sale-5 year old Morgan/Paint Gelding Blue eyes. Dark Sorrel 15.5 hands Rides/Gated $600 5 Year Old Creamilo Gelding light gray eyes Green Broke Ground Gentle Rides. $500

I have 2 horses for sale a 3 year old gelding foxtrotter that is a doppler grey and has bloodlines to zan bar grey this horse is green broke just needs some saddle time and is naturally gated with 30 days perfessional training. The other is a solid black quester horse colt 17 month holter broke and leads other then that just been handled no holes in either horses and have no bad habits since they have not been tought any.

Horse for Sale-This gelding was born in 2010. He is half Pacifino and half Quarter Horse and may be gaited.

Gurlla- $500-4 year old gurlla gelding grade QH stands 14'1 hands tall easy to catch and load stands to be saddle and stands when you get on him no buck, kick, or bit just an easy going horse asking

A Few Little Issues...

So this is one of the most confusing ads I have seen in some time. First off, here it is.

So, are they all for sale? Some of them? One of them? Or are they just being offered to ride for a bit? Apparently they are brock and make nice projet. Ok, fair dues, English may not be the advertiser's first language, but for the sake of just one sentence they couldn't find anyone at all to proof read?!

'Dance horses' are not one of my favourite things either as I understand there are more bad ways to train them than there are good ones.

I also hope that the horse shown only has his head tied up so high for the short term, as I am led to believe that some trainers use prolonged tethering of this type to subdue the horse and make it more likely that they keep their heads low when ridden.

Overall, a real head scratcher here!